Amy, Gina and Rene's Story, Part Three
Earlier this year, we were excited to facilitate the adoption of 14-year-old Rene by loving parents Amy and Gina. We are proud to share the story of their adoption, through their own words, in a multi-part series on our blog. Read part one here, and read part two here!
Amy and Gina have a special treat for the last part of their series on our blog: an exclusive interview with their son Rene! Amy and Gina adopted Rene earlier this year. After writing about their experience with adoption, the couple wanted to share Rene’s experience in his own words.
What has been the biggest change in your life since being adopted?
I am living with two moms. I don’t get to make as many decisions for myself. I have to do homework now. I live with the handsomest cat in the world. Our dog Boomer is a savage, and our dog AJ is known as “AJ da wise.”
What has been the best thing about being adopted?
I have a permanent home, and I don’t have to be worried about moving around. My favorite thing about my current home is that we have pets, and that they are weird pets. What kind of cat do you know that wants to eat your fingers? And, mommy still wants a sugar glider.
What has been the hardest thing?
Leaving your old life behind, including every connection you made back where you lived. The family that adopted you could make things better by trying to make new connections in the home where you are in. You could get used to a foster parent, but you would have to leave it all if someone adopted you.
What do you think about being adopted without your brothers and sisters?
It doesn’t bother me because that is how adoption works. Sometimes they adopt you with your siblings and sometimes they don’t. Sometimes I blame DCF about it.
If you could change one thing about the way that adoption works, what would it be?
I don’t like having no privacy. I am a foster kid and a (prospective family) could see any files they want to about me. But before I met you, my social worker only told me that there were two women who wanted to adopt me – she couldn’t tell me your names or anything else about you. This is for the family’s privacy but it felt unequal because you knew everything about me.
What advice would you give to a family looking to adopt a child?
Be open-minded, because some kids get a label attached that does not really belong with them. I knew a kid who got put under a label as a horrible kid. He went to the same alternative school as me, and he was living with his grandma because his father was in prison. He was labeled as a violent person but during the time we were at school together I never saw him do anything bad.
What is the best way to approach a child at an “adoption party” – if there is one?
Be very calm. Do not stare. If you want to talk, come over and talk. Otherwise, I will think you are creepy.